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Thursday, September 07, 2006

Think B4 U upgrade!

People! in response to my post on marriage I have been receiving enormous responses. I think I’hv touched a nerve deep inside u or may be as some of u said u liked the way it has been presented. Pretty straight forward Right! Anyhow Thank U V Much!
Of the many responses received by me this one was very peculiar, I thought I should post this also for readers to follow closely…

Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0


MAIL from USER after a few Months itself!

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Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from ‘Girlfriend 5.0’ to ‘Wife 1.0’. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, 'Wife 1.0' installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as ‘BachelorNights 10.3’, ‘Cricket 5.0’, ‘BeerWithBuddies 7.5’, and ‘Outings 3.6’ no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. It seems I can’t keep ‘Wife 1.0’ in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to ‘Girlfriend 5.0’, but the 'uninstall' doesn't work on ‘Wife 1.0’.

Please help!

Thanks,
"A Troubled User"

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REPLY:

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Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about. Many people upgrade from ‘Girlfriend 5.0’ to ‘Wife 1.0’, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

‘Wife 1.0’ is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete ‘Wife 1.0’ and to return to ‘Girlfriend 5.0’. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to ‘Girlfriend 5.0’ because ‘Wife 1.0’ is designed not to allow this.
(Look in your ‘Wife 1.0’ Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support)

I recommend that you keep ‘Wife1.0’ and work on improving the environment. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear 9.9" to alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

’Wife 1.0’ is a great program, but it tends to be very high on maintenance. ‘Wife 1.0’ comes with several support programs, such as ‘Clean 2.5’, ‘Sweep 3.0’, ‘Cook 1.5’ and ‘DoLaundry 4.2’. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program ‘NagNag 9.5’. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of ‘Wife 1.0’ is to purchase additional software. I recommend ‘Sarees 2.1’ and ‘Jewellery 5.0’.

STATUTORY WARNING: DO NOT, under any circumstances, install ‘SecretaryWithShortSkirt 3.3’. This application is not supported by ‘Wife 1.0’ and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

So Best of Luck with your new system.

With hoards of Apologies & Regrets on not being of much use against this system, of which I also am a part now,
Chic

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”Any resemblance to the incidence or any person living or dead mentioned here, may purely be a matter of coincidence and the author doesn’t claim any rights on it”.

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